 |
| All they can say is no, right? |
Now, where were we?
Oh, right, so I did this road trip thing years ago and now no one cares anymore because here I am this unemployed girl leaning on nothing but the remainder of previously earned paychecks and a bottle of whiskey. Hey now, don't judge me because I drink. Judge me for the million other reasons you could have if you sat and talked to me for a day or two.
I quit my job because I hit a brick wall and didn't know how to find my way back out of it. It was Saturday May fourth, sunny and well enough a day. I was out to breakfast when my phone rang. Conversations went as conversations normally do, no astounding end to say so, but allofasudden I had a full blown panic attack. Out of nowhere, I started breathing heavily, my heart started racing and I was shaking. I couldn't even finish my food.
From here, it only progressed. I was worked up about everything and nothing that could have ever been anything at any point in time, but I was worked up and that was all that mattered. That night, just as I fell asleep I woke up again, this time in a sobbing-heaving-retching panic. I did not sleep again.
The next day, I could not be consoled and was sobbing myself into a mess. I called in and said I could never return to work again. Seriously, when they say life changes in an instant, I think some of them might be talking about moments like that. For whatever reason, I could not convince myself to go back there, and to this day I still cannot fathom stepping back over there.
Too bad I'm not at the age where it makes sense to run away anymore. I think that 30 years old is a little late to be playing the game of "What do I want to do with the rest of my life?" But hey, I'm going to give whatever it is my all.
So what the hell am I doing? Panhandling the internet, it looks like, because as it turns out the skills of someone who was selling body jewelry to piercers in the industry are not in-demand. Other than management skills and working in customer service, I think it's probably been a gap of 9-year-uselessness. It's simply not something that can be done professionally anywhere else.
I know I can write, but either I need the idea for a story or I need to get my foot in on the article writing world. Either way, I've got quite a bit of work in front of me.
Wish me luck!
